Stumbling down the staircase in the pre-dawn light, I sleepily make my way to the outdoor shower. Hot water rains down on me and I stick my toothbrush in my mouth. Choirs of birds sing and the ocean breeze has the Palm Trees dancing. Yesterday's rain is gone though wetness remains.
I hear a door and look upward.
The Cat Lady is standing on her third story deck and is watching me.
She is naked.
I throw up in my mouth a little.
She sees that I am watching her watch me.
Covering her breasts with one arm she turns around exposing a full white moon. It is blinding! On cue several cats start to moan.
I throw up a little bit more.
"Holy Shit!" I say to God who is speechless.
I feel bad for God who is obviously distraught that She created such a massive white moon.
The Cat Lady walks inside her bedroom and assumes position in front of an open window and keeps watching me. She now holds a black feral cat in front of her breast. Cat hair floats around her head like a hallo.
It strikes me that I forgot to grab a towel.
She cuddles the black cat.
I turn the water off.
She continues to watch.
"Oh well," I say, opening the door to stroll naked to the screened in porch.
"Meow," I hear her cat call.
"At least my butt's tanned," I say out loud.
What do you do?
It's a Monday.