Most days, but certainly not all, I can do most anything for a couple of hours, if I get high enough.
My celebrations of life are calculated and planned, but retain a spontaneous element because I have a history of last minute cancelations when I'm just not up to it that day.
All the stars align and Sarah takes us to lunch at Longhorns, an old favorite of ours, because recently I'd mentioned I'd like to go back one more time.
"Do they have fries?" Che asks, on the way.
"Really good ones," we assure her.
I can't remember the last time I've eaten a steak and I'm excited. Sarah gets French Onion Soup and a salad.
"Is this the last time I'll ever have a food orgasim in my mouth?" I blurt out, biting down on Flo's Filet and a baked potato smothered in whipped butter.
After our feast, Sarah drives us to the Mall and takes Che clothes shopping. She's in that crazy age between little girl and growing-up-too-damn-fast and has outgrown a lot of her clothes.
They delight in choosing the latest fashions, making two trips to the Dressing Rooms. I'm asked my opinion of several selections as Che tries on everything.
She is beyond excited!
Sarah somehow negotiates a 20% discount on everything so we're laughing as leave.
To celebrate, Che and I ride purple animals around, darting around people, laughing and having much fun together. Sarah sits, laughing and taking photos while guarding Che's new wardrobe in the bags lying at her feet.
Che gets on a high-jump trampoline that catapults her skyward, towards glass ceilings above. Sarah and I take pictures, applauding and yelling words of encouragement.
Then it's on to "Build a Bear" where she selects a Bunny to create, opting to record Sarah and me wishing her a good night as the voices of the newly named "Cinnamon."
"I love you Clare!" Sarah passionately says.
"Daddy loves you Che-Bay," I softly add.
On the way home, she listens to Cinnamon tell her again and again.
"Dad, I wish you would have talked louder."
"Yeah," I wistfully sigh, "I wish I could."
Once home, Che tries on her new clothes and announces what she's wearing at Dress Down Day at school on Friday.
A short while later, we're huddled on the sofa together, watching "American Idol" which we haven't seen in a decade, but we're in rapture together doing so.
And that's a day in my celebration of life now, rather than later.
I'm very humbled and grateful it's kicked off like it has, and hope for many great reports like this one in the future.
Right up till the end.
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Having the celebration of my life now! Be part at https://gofund.me/ffda4f4b
