Lots of lovers can't work through it so ... they don't.
Some do and learn that they really did love these things all along.
It's the same with the place you've always wanted to live.
You get there and after a while it's background scenery that's occasionally appreciated ... living at the beach, in the mountains, in the greatest city on earth or way out in the country away from it all.
Before you know it you're dreaming about going some other place.
Some fall in love with the place again, most dream about somewhere else and a few move again.
It's the same with Churches, political persuasions, annual events, weekend activities and ... Hell! even family reunions.
The other day my friend Art says, while staring out of a window at something far beyond the Marsh and the Back River, "Micheal, none of it matters ..."
He's been told he only has a short time to live and a verse from the Bible pops in my head, "Vanity of vanities! All is vanity!" is how one of the 16 different King James versions put it.
"Meaningless! Everything is meaningless," is how the modern translations put it.
Either way, they're wrong.
Art's wrong too but I cut him some slack because he's got a lot on his mind right now.
His life has been meaningful as Hell to mine!
When I went through the roughest part of my life and wouldn't leave the house, he threw a Cotillion Party complete with beer, steamed oysters and lots of people.
In the south mostly white families host very formal balls to introduce daughters who have come of age to society.
Art thought I should come out and took the Savannah Morning News pictures of Cotillions, cut one out, glued my photograph in and formally reintroduced me to my friends.
As hurt as I was at the time it me laugh ... and made me feel loved when that's the last thing I felt.
"Sarah Blue Eyes," is the first thing he ever said to Sarah. "Did anyone ever tell you that you have the most beautiful eyes," and then ... as only Art can do, he continues, "Well Shit of course they have!"
Every day when I walk the dogs, Art's waiting with treats for them and we'll stand in his yard, talk boy talk ... give each other grief over college football because he's Auburn and I'm a DAWG ... or get serious about life, love, disappointment and hope.
There's nothing meaningless or vain about how rich and MEANINGFUL these moments were.
If death doesn't make you think about such things ... then you're well on your way to dying anyway.
I very much love everything about my life right now!
I love where I'm at and where I'm going too. I love our house and what it's becoming. I love my friends and delight in our interactions. I love watching my kids in adulthood and where they're taking themselves. I love Sarah and the wonderful moments we share on even the worst of days. I love God who drives me crazy staying quiet when I'd much prefer dialogue.
Having spent countless hours in his yard talking about such things, I know Art loves it all too and the thought of leaving it scares the Hell out of him because ... he finds it so meaningful.
If you've bothered to read this I want you to stop and take a deep breath ... take a good look around you ... look at what you've got ... who you're with ... and touch the meaningful things again.
One day they'll be gone or you'll be gone.
But that's not today.
And if you have a moment left over, say a prayer, send some good Karma or a wish or two for my friend Art.
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