Smiling Out Loud

Most people just get along doing the things that they’re supposed to do and life remains pretty constant. There are others of us though who blow up our lives or sometimes have our lives blow up on us.

At 57 years of age my friend Trolley Joe decided to blow his up. He had a successful career, marriage and kids. Then he went through a divorce and lived alone for a couple of years before meeting the love of his life, Barbara. Though madly in love, something inside of him was calling him away. She said if you got to go then go, which is about as mighty expression of love as there is.

So he called a friend who lived on a house boat in Key West and asked if there was enough room for him to crash for a while. The invitation was made and Joe made his way to the island. He slept in a tiny compartment but it had a view of the Gulf of Mexico and all of the tension and frustrations of his life began to disappear.

In a short period of time, he got a job driving the Conch Train, the tourist tour of Key West. He proudly called Barbara to inform her of his good fortune. “Looks like I’m gonna be staying awhile,” he explained. “I have a job making $6.50 an hour!”

Of course Barbara did what most wives who love their husband would do and quit her job as a nurse to move to Key West. She also got a job working for the Conch Train. They found their own place and for two years became one with the island that succeeded from the Union during the 1970s!

It was an idyllic life but one day Barbara told Joe that she wanted to be nearer to their children and by then he had healed from the scars of the past. After a bit of discussion he found that he could “transfer” to Savannah and work for the Trolley tours there. They found a condo on Wilmington Island to be near the ocean and Joe drives the streets of Savannah Wednesday through Saturday.

Sundays through Tuesday he is one of the original members of the Bored, a collection of friends that congregate every midday to toast life on Tybee Island. Thanks to O Johnny, we have hats and tee shirts that have “Official Tybidiot” on it ($25 if anyone would like to order one; plus shipping and handling). I further understand that Joe, Barbara and their daughter have “Certificates of Authenticity” as official Bored members.

The point of all of this is that I’ve wanted to do it for years. I begged for a Sabbatical several years back but didn’t get it. So I fall into the category of life blowing up on me rather than me blowing up my life to get to where I want and need to be.

It hurts like hell to do it this way but I’ve never been know for taking on easy tasks always preferring the hardest way instead. I mean I made a career out of homelessness and AIDS.

In the stages of loss you reach a point called “Emptying” and I think that I’ve finally gotten there. This morning Goddess and I meandered along the Back River looking at the High Tides covering the marsh grass. There was no breeze and the orange sun danced on the water. My I-pod played in my ears.

It always seemed like a good idea
Buy a little house boat free and clear
Living on Shrimp and Navigator beer
Every day goes by without a cloud
And every time you see him
He’s smiling out loud.

Trolley Joe smiles a lot. And this morning I found myself smiling out loud too.