Heart & Soul

The last time it happened, Chelsea did it.

She always made me things; drawings with notes or lyrics ... scrapbooks of photographs of the two of us illustrated with her creativity and remembrances ... Compact Discs full of music she wanted to share.

Before that Kristen did too.

And that was Valentine's Day.

I'd buy them candy in boxes shaped like hearts.

As they got older, I'd take them out to dinner ... unless somebody else was which was normally the case.

This time last year I was in Myrtle Beach with my son Jeremy and Bill Berry (not the former drummer for R.E.M. but the other one who went to Seminary with me). It was a bachelor's celebration of love ... meaning Jeremy called my brilliant-daughter-in-law Marie and talked about how much he loved her and Bill called Kathy and talked about how much he loved her and I ... drank wine and looked at the ocean.

We all got wasted later and Jeremy threw a temper tantrum over wanting me to be happy ... Now! ... Dammit!!

I think Bill lapsed into prayer or something ... no ... I remember ... he ordered another round.

Jeremy and I made up driving the four hours back to Tybee. We're very close anyway and I think he was bummed that I was spending Valentine's Day "Valentine-less". It was OK. Like every time he and I do something together, it fun and memorable ... now it's another story to tell.

But then last night ... I stumbled in Sarah's door and had a pink piece of paper thrust in my face with silver words describing in detail everything that Laurel likes about me. The page was full of interesting things. Who knew my long curly hair is endearing to her? It drives my Mom nuts. Or ... that my occasional utilization of cuss words has made the impression that I'm standing up for myself?

She had to sit at the table and read it to me which was ... I don't know the word ... Heart Smiles. Sometimes you need two words.

Then Maddie had a keyboard and wanted to play me the song that I was teaching her last week. So we sat on the couch and played Heart and Soul together.

Cassidy was dressed like a rabbit for no apparent reason as she handed me a bag with tissue paper coming out of the top. Inside was a jug of the wine that I drink (Yes Cheryl Sadowski ... Really!) and a travel coffee mug.

They wanted what I'd brought them but I told them they'd have to wait. It wasn't Valentine's Day yet.

Then we watched "The Bachelor".

Let's be honest. I could less about him. He seems to be doing alright. He and a bunch of beautiful but bitchy women were in Belize. Sarah and I are going there soon so it was more kind of like the Travel Channel ... except for that really bitchy girl with the black hair on top of the Mayan Ruins who put the Tarantula on her arm. I like her ... though Maddie, Laurel and Cass all think she's a bitch and are in disbelief that she got a rose.

But Ben the Bachelor seems pretty happy about it all. How can he not be? When he's not giving out roses ... he's making out.

(Which brings me to Robin Wheeler. I delivered the message. Let me know what happens.)

This morning, in the darkness, I lay velvet heart shaped boxes in front of three bedroom doors. I blew kisses of love to Kristen and Chelsea. I wished Jeremy all of the love that he deserves and I thanked God for giving him Marie. Then I remembered Sam Harris who loves Chelsea and a bunny and thanked him too.

Then Goddess and I drove home in predawn of the day.

And the sun rose ... looking like a velvet heart in the sky.