Where have all the good cops gone?

Goddess is in trouble with the law again. Winston, the little gay dog, is an accomplice though he may be a perpetrator too. Over the past week the Tybee Island Police Department have visited the house several times. The first time an officer left a card in the door with a note on the back that read, "Please keep dogs inside or citations will be issued." What's funny is that Goddess and Winston, the little gay dog, were inside the whole time and only let outside with adult supervision. He noted that the card was left at 1950 hours. I wonder why he wrote that rather 7:30 which is the time it was when he left the card. Did he have miltary backup? Another hand written note was left by an officer on a ripped out page from a notepad that has somebody else's address on it ... not ours, so I'm wondering who's it for? Am I supposed to deliver it to the address on the note? Tybee doesn't give cops official things to write on? It warns whoever the note is actually intended for that they "are being warned to take care of their nusiance dog." After that, I get a knock on the door and its Jerry who controls animals on the island. He tells me that I need to shut my windows so my dogs do not bother the neighbors. They are both asleep as he tells me this. None of my neighbors have mentioned anything to us and I explain that. He replies that he's received anonymous calls. I wonder if its Jerry Rainey. The next day he returns with a Tybee Island police officer who appears to be twelve. "I stopped by last night and your dog was barking." "Where were you," I asked. "In your yard," he said. 'Ah, that's probably why the dog was barking. Did he stop when you left?" "Yes," he replied not liking the line of questioning. "That explains that," I conclude. "We're going to ticket you anyway," he said. So they wrote me a citation to take Goddess and Winston, the little gay dog, to court next month. In reading the citation I have grown from 5 feet ten inches tall to 6:1. Apparently I've also moved ten blocks away because the address is wrong. I wonder who anonymous is as none of my neighbors have mentioned anything to me about the fellons in our house. Sarah looks up the noise ordinance for dogs and there's no way. So Goddess and Winston, the little gay dog, are getting their first attorney. We have a preponderance of evidence, numerous character references, and first hand knowledge that Goddess smokes dope and sleeps most of the time while Winston, the little gay dog, does Meth and chases himself around the house. It's a crazy world! It makes me wonder where have all the good cops gone? Where's Steve Talent? Major Jim Woods? Or the great Tybee Police officer EVER Jimmy Todd? What is the age limit for Tybee cops these days? Where have good neighbors gone? Those who come over and say, "Hey man your dogs bothering me. Can you do something about it?" I gotta go. Winston, the little gay dog, is already picking out what he wants to wear to court. Goddess is snoring beside an ashtray full of buds. And I googled "Dog Lawyer" and found someone to represent. I was sold when a dog wearing a suit said, "Maybe it's because I'm a dog too but this case looks black and white to me."