My Mom the critic

My Mom just got on to me.

Again.

At my age you'd think Mom would be beyond getting on to me but it doesn't bother her at all.

She's got me over a barrel because I'm really glad she's still here!

I miss my Dad and really enjoy my Mom ... well, except for when she's a critic.

Plus, she has an uncanny ability to "set me up" before knocking my legs out from under me.

"I really loved what you wrote about Frank," she begins. "Did you make any of that up?"

"No, that's pretty much how it happened," I reply. "I left some stuff out."

"Like what?"

"While he's having breakfast with me his wife's in the hospital. She was being discharged so he had to cut our visit short to go get her. Can you believe he drove all the way out here just to meet with me?"

"He's always loved you," Mom says and then moves on. "Frank is a wonderful man."

"Now I don't know Erin. Tell me about her."

"We met in Chicago when I was with the Street Medicine Institute. She's great! It's pretty much what I wrote. You'd like Erin."

"She sounds like a wonderful person," she agrees.

THEN!!!!!!!

"You used a bad word the other day in something you wrote. You're better than that."

"You mean when I said 'Holy Shit!' describing what I had to get through to get to Sarah?"

"Don't say things like that?"

I pause to chuckle.

"Mom that's really the way people talk."

"Well you're better than that," she replies.

"Mom they said the same thing to Hemingway."

"Well they don't need to say it about you."

I decide it's time to open the Fridge, get a beer and stroll back outside to the deck. In times like these, it's just best to give up. I want to live to fight another day.

"Yes Mom," I say.

"Good," she says satisfactorily.

"When are you going to write about Goddess again? It's always about Winston, the little gay dog. People miss Goddess."

"Yes mam," I nod, sipping the beer in the setting sun, loving the fact that I have my Mom.

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An eccentric life dotted with eclectic characters pop from the pages of award winning author Micheal Elliott’s newest book Sandy Bottoms & Duct Taped Hearts. His musings immerse you in a world of headshaking wonder, gut wrenching laughter, heart touched tenderness and empathetic tears.

Never letting the truth stand in the way of a good story, Elliott’s ninth book takes you on a wild journey of “Wow! Really! I can’t believe that!” every day moments. Sandy Bottoms & Duct Taped Hearts exemplifies his gift of capturing common thoughts and painting them perfectly into words.

At www.meellc.com