Church Koozies

"I've never spoken into a Koozie before," the Mayor says holding his baby while speaking into a Koozie.

"Welcome to Bar Church," I whisper.

No self respecting islander wears socks so there's none to cover the microphones in the Ocean Breeze ... during the impromptu service on the Beach ... to thank God a Hurricane hit others far worse than us.

I don't know why organized religion is mostly reduced to "us against them" ... or "God likes us more than you" ... or "Our island wasn't hit and your town got the shit kicked out it so God obviously prefers here and not there" ... but at Bar Church we try to not pay attention to ... dogma or theology.

At Bar Church it's sort of like Barney does religion ... "I love you ... You love me ... we are one family" ... island life ... hard to describe but wonderful to experience.

A Hurricane came ... a Hurricane went ... our houses are mostly still here ... let's have a celebration ... it's the island way!

So that's what we did.

On the beach ... with a sound system ... no permit ... not much planning ... and no socks.

We asked God before the service began, "Where's a few good socks when you need them?"

God didn't answer.

But Joey who plays Bass has lots of Koozies ... not sure about the beers to go in them ... but he tapes them to the microphones so the wind wouldn't drown out the sound and a worship service was born!

It was pretty cool.

Church the way God planned it ... no stained glass ... bulletins ... pulpits ... choir lofts ... suits and socks ... panty hose ... and who needs a baptismal pool when you got an Ocean?

"It's a special place," the Mayor says holding his little girl in his arms.

"It's true," I whisper again. "We just got each other."

The sun, sand, breeze, Seagulls, salt air and ... I swear to God a crippled Jesus was walking on the water ... maybe it was the silhouette of a Paddle boarder ... made it all pretty Holy.

The music was out of this world.

Of course the cops showed up to ask if we have a permit.

"Oh yeah," someone mumbles, "well we did but it blew away ... besides the Mayor's here."

"Oh!" the officers exclaim ... slowly taking their hands off the tickets they were writing.

As soon as Church is over, Joey grabs his Koozies.

The rest of us hang around laughing.

You know ... the way worship should end.