Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Anywhere and Anytime (To President Reagan)

"Is this what you do in the mornings," she whispered as I poured coffee into the cup?

Holding her blankey with blond hair all askew and sleep still in her eyes, it was as though she'd just stumbled into one of the great mysteries of the universe ... experiencing an Ah-Ha moment ... so this is what you do?

In the car she continued to whisper though there was no need, "Why do you get up so early?"

"Well," I said backing out of the driveway, "it started so I could get to the television set before my brother David did."

"Why," she whispered in the blackness of the car?

"So I could pick which cartoon I wanted to watch. Back before the Cartoon Network we were oppressed people and could only watch them early in the morning and for about an hour after school."

"Really?" she asked in disbelief rubbing large blue eyes.

"Yeah, it was all government related somehow. The F.D.A. or something like that tried to keep cartoons off the air so kids like me couldn't watch them. Then Ronald Reagan became President and everything changed."

"How," she asked as she turned the heat up in the car?

"Do you know who Ronald Reagan was," I asked as she shook her head from side to side?

"He was President of the United States. He really liked cartoons. So he did the funniest thing. It was amazing actually! He deregulated everything and make government bigger while promising to make it smaller at the same time. He was incredible! And he had great hair."

Lying her sleepy head on my shoulder, she yawned really big and asked, "So that's why you get up so early. The President did it"?

It gave me pause as we sped through the darkness of a predawn morning on the Tybee Road.

"Yes," I explained, "Ronald Regan is responsible. And you should thank him because there would be no 24/7 Cartoon Network without him. My generation never had that opportunity but President Regan was a visionary looking out for you guys."

"What's a generation," she asked sticking her head in her blankey?

"I don't know," I replied rolling to a stop in front of the Breakfast Club, "mine was lost."

Excited she peered into the window and saw the Closed sign and said, "Ah, it's closed. We can't get in. Where's Cheryl?"

"Come on baby," I said, "President Reagan deregulated this too. The guy was amazing. A real visionary."

So we stumbled into the Breakfast Club taking full advantage of deregulation. FOX News was on which was also invented by President Reagan. As was maxing out credit cards. He was incredible and so far ahead of his time!

"Hey," she asked finishing her egg. "Can we go watch cartoons?"

"Absolutely," I said giving her a squeeze. "We'll start with FOX and then move to the mainline networks before going to CNN, MSNBC and WTOC."

"Oh," she said with tears welling in her eyes.

"Then we'll find Spongebob Sqarepants, but I have to warn you," I explained as I tenderly buckled her in, "the problem with Spongebob is he looks like every member of Congress, state legislatures, most evangelical pastors, WAY too many Mayors ..."

"Hey Mike," she interrupted with the big blue seven year old eyes with the sun rising in them, "so we can watch cartoons?"

I hugged her tight.

"Anytime baby."

"Anywhere."

Thanks to President Reagan.