and the ensuing storm of really funny revelations of things Brian Williams didn't do either ...
Like sitting behind Abraham Lincoln in the Ford Theater ...
Holding the ring for Frodo as they cross a bridge ...
Encouraging Pope Francis to "just do it dammit" ...
Helping Bruce Jenner with his "life choices" ...
Grabbing Michelle Obama while saying to the President, "Let me show you how it's done" ...
Writing Sarah Palin's speech in Iowa last week ...
In light of these and other revelations, I have decided to come clean too, clear my conscious and confess a couple of things that I've kept hidden.
It was Mitch Wesley and Mark Wood who fired the gun in the Haunted House that night in college while Dedra Dukes sat in the getaway car ... I had nothing to do with it.
It was Johnny O and Henry Levy who put the "Clothing Optional" stickers on every cross walk leading to the Beach on Tybee Island ... I had nothing to do with it.
It was Jodee who spray painted the white billboard with black letters spelling "Why would Jesus care?" ... I had nothing to do with it.
It was Roma Harper who put the lit dear stolen from the City's Christmas display on Johnny O's care one night ... I had nothing to do with it.
It was Jenny Orr who gave David Ring shots of Crown Royal at the "Best Buns on the Beach" competition that lead to Diane Ring helping her husband while he dances on a picnic table wearing a leopard thong with a wardrobe malfunction ... I had nothing to do with it.
It was my son Jeremy who made the "Yard of the Month Sign" placing it in Bobby Phillips yard with the words "NOT" written on the back ... I had nothing to do with it.
There I feel better.
I'm sure Brian does too.
