Which got me thinking about Church.
My sister Angi updates her status to let the world know she's "@worshipping God."
My brother David is not as cutting edge and goes to Church without letting the entire world know.
My Mom goes to early service and gets home in time to watch the highlights on ESPN of the Georgia game.
Sarah's Dad is conducting service at this very moment and she's supporting him by staying in bed, waking up slow, pondering what we're going to do today ... if we do anything today.
I'm the Heathen of the bunch which is funny because I'm an ordained Southern Baptist Minister sitting on the Beloved Back Deck, singling island songs, eyeing the new blender Sarah bought, envisioning the wonderful concoctions we're going to make to "Praise the Lord" later today.
Somewhere just under 50% of the nation is attending Church right now and it makes me wonder ...
How many congregants are staring at their phones during worship?
How many still fall asleep during the sermon like in the olden days?
How many are lusting?
How many are wishing they were somewhere else?
How many are hungry and thinking about dinner (e.g. lunch for Northern readers)?
How many are marveling at how the Preacher got his hair to stay that way?
How many are wondering why in the Hell a woman's in charge?
How many are already pumped about the Nascar race starting in a couple of hours?
How many are reliving the great sex they had last night and smelling their fingers?
How many are singing songs in their head?
How many have to pee but refuse to embarrass themselves by getting up in the middle of the pew and kneeing themselves out?
How many are watching the "Minister of Music" study his fingernails?
How many can't see around the head in front of them?
Me?
I'm thinking about going to the beach.
This is the day that the Lord has made.
Let us rejoice and be glad in it.
