Saturday, April 13, 2013

Matters of the heart

"How many husbands have you had?" she asked over a glass of wine with her friend.

"Six," was the casual reply.

After a moment of disbelieving silence the words exploded. "SIX! You've been married six times?"

Laughing, the woman shook her head. "Oh heaven's no. I've only been married twice."

Some would argue that it's looking for love in all the wrong places but after the laughter it makes me wonder. I've had lunch with lots of people, men and women, who have confessed relationships outside of the one they were in. Often they were married and sometimes they'd been committed to one another.

They had the need to share and for whatever reason they told me.

Perhaps they were looking for safety-in-numbers consolation.

I don't  know.

I've read that the average person falls in love seven times during their lives which really makes it hard for those only married to one person. You have to give those folks credit. Six times when their hearts yearned for someone else they remained faithful to the one.

While 50% of us remained married to the one, a healthy percentage of those explored relationships with someone else.

The rest of us just went all out, following our hearts or losing our minds and ending up with someone else.

Both ways are hard.

Making it harder is the condemnation that rains down. We love affairs! To talk about them secretly as we judge and condemn others who are merely trying to find the perfect love they believe in.

Love is enough thing to find. It's even harder to hold on to.

If you have it, good for you!

If you're still searching, good for you too!

To both I encourage you to not settle.

Follow your heart.