"You've fallen into a pattern of taking long naps on Sunday," Sarah explains.
Sometimes I do not understand her at all.
The Bible plainly states Sunday is a day of rest.
After creating everything in the known Universe God rested on the 7th day ... which is no longer accurately observed because it really is Saturday but lets not squabble with our Jewish friends ... or those crazy ass 7th Day Adventist people.
God took a nap on the first Sunday ... I mean Saturday ... I mean when He was done ... and I take that to mean naps are wonderful, glorious, God given things.
It doesn't actually say God took a nap in the Bible but I can't imagine what else it would have been.
Besides our weekends are a blur.The girls conduct a hostile takeover of our house on Friday ... pillaring the cupboards ... raping the Fridge ... trashing their rooms and talking over each other so nobody hears a damn thing.
Saturday ... we're in a parade as official members of the O'Neill'
s ... and Chelsea is here with a friend ... Batman and Robin show up ... and we march ... drink ... eat ... have fun ... and go home.
Sunday begins with Bar Church ... which is an all morning affair.
Sunday afternoon begins with lunch and Maddie, the 13 year old, planning her day's affairs, which naturally disrupt everybody's else's plans.
Sarah talks to her daughter about it.
I take a nap.
When I wake Sarah ... looking like she is in desperate need of sleep ... is on the Beloved Back Deck talking to Laurel, the 10 year old, ... Maddie is out on a date managing her affairs ... no one's heard from Cassidy, the 8 year old, all weekend.
Now it's Monday and I should be working but ... the girls talked us into letting them skip school today so ... ALL HELL'S GETTING READY TO BREAK LOOSE!
Sarah went to work ... leaving me to manage affairs.
I'm having a tough time getting started this morning and I've got lots to do ... though they're going to sleep until 11:00 or so ... but I've got it all figured out.
When the girls wake up ... we'll have a nice Brunch together ... then they can do whatever the Hell they want ... as I take a nap.
Don't Worry!
I'll wake up in plenty of time to clean the house, prepare supper, light some candles, make it nice for Sarah to come home and ... find the girls before she arrives.
I think that's about as good as you can do on a Monday.
You just get through them as best you can.
