55 Going on 17

I haven't hung out in many Tattoo Parlors in my life but we strolled into one last night. Tybrissa Street (formerly 16th Street and located between 15th and 17th Streets but inexplicably named Tybrissa) was packed with tourists and locals having a good time on a pleasant summer evening. After dinner and listening to the Sam Adams Band, who play damn good live music, we were making our way back home when we passed it. "You going to do it?" Sarah asked. Pausing, I looked inside. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dedra looking at me. "Let's do," I said grabbing Sarah's hand and we went inside. The first thing we saw was a guy having his tongue pierced. I thought Dedra was going to pass out. My son Jeremy and my brilliant daughter-in-law Marie have tongue rings so I'm used to the way they roll their mouth bling around when they're thinking. It was interesting to see a needle five miles long go through the guy's tongue, but ... he likes it I'm OK with it too. I'm open that way. My daughter Chelsea has a nose ring but she doesn't wear it much anymore. It's probably because she's being held captive on the campus of the Georgia Institute of Technology by her fiancee Sam. But she used to wear it when she was at the much cooler University of Georgia. Sarah has three ear rings in one ear and one in the other. She used to have a belly button ring but I've yet to see her wear any bling in it and believe you me ... I like her belly button and spend a lot of time around it. Regardless, I don't know why I never got my ear pierced. I always intended to. Once Johnny O bought us fake ear rings ... the clip on kind and we wore them around the island. Whitley was the only one who thought we'd actually done it. "With all of the rules you've broken," Sarah said, "I can't believe you haven't done this yet. What do you think your Mother will say?" "Oh she'll be mad," I quickly replied without hesitation. "I know my Mom." Then I thought of my friend Trolly Joe who died a couple of years ago. Before he did, he got his ear pierced AND ... he started having Pedicures (which is one of life's great pleasures. I like walking in with a cooler full of beer, make them change the television to ESPN and have a woman play with my feet. It's great! And if any of you macho men haven't done this yet ... well Trolly Joe and I sure celebrate this ... I'm talking to you Mark Wood and Mitch Wesley!). So I sat in the chair, had some alcohol splashed on my ear lobe and felt a pin prick. "You're done," Aaron said. Aaron had one piercing and two Tattoos. He didn't have an ass so I'm uncertain how his jeans didn't fall down. I assume he hocked it to pay for either the piercing or the Tattoos. So that was it. At fifty-five years of age, I finally got around to doing something that I meant to doing in High School. It's never too late to do something that you've always wanted to do. Besides ... Sarah thinks it's hot. O Johnny (not to be confused with Johnny O) has already written wanting to plan his piercing upon (a) his retirement or (b) his birthday. Either way it's a party! Plus I like it. Fifty-five going on seventeen.