Saturday, July 14, 2012

Showing me the way

I am now the same age my Father was when I returned to live on Tybee Island and spend the next quarter-of-a-century working to make Savannah a better place. He was newly retired and had remade himself from a full time working railroad man to a retired golfer who lived for lunch with his friends and trips around the world. I was just starting a meterodic rise to the top of my profession. Dad died a couple of years ago and not soon after that my career came to an end. We both passed on to new things. I'm uncertain why I'm thinking about this. Perhaps it's because my birthday was last week and somewhere in my brain or in my heart the connection was made about the fact that I'm now the age he was when I came home. It's food for thought. Like Dad had then, I've mostly settled into a routine that's been good for me. I rise early, go to the Breakfast Club, come home and write from the Beloved Back before doing whatever work I do or traveling to wherever I was going. For a couple of years, that pretty much defined my days. There are radical changes though. I kiss Sarah before getting out of bed, make sure her coffee and juice are ready before I leave, and rush the dogs out of the house so they won't wake her. Goddess, my constant companion on the journey of one, know has a baby brother, Winston (who is gay) and she plays with him and looks after him when something goes wrong. Now as I soon as I sit on the Beloved Back Deck to write, one of the girls wakes up and joins me. Maddie will ask me "What's for breakfast?" Laurel will sit on the deck with Winston and talk without ceasing. Cassidy will wrap herself in a blanket, sit beside me and star into space while asking me the most random questions. While all of this is going on, I do my best to let Sarah sleep (often failing because its five-against-one ... three little girls who love their Mommy and two dogs who do too). Our house is only vaguely similar to when I lived here before. It's better now, less cluttered (well ... not the girls rooms ... but everything else), more elegant, much more comfortable and ... I am now co-owner of Disco Ball which hangs above the spiral staircase and has a light that shines on it transfering the entire living room into a set from Saturday Night Fever. It's a perfect combination of quiet and noise, naked Barbie dolls and beautiful drawings for me to hang on the refridgerator, a dish washer that is perpetually full and hugs for no apparent reason. Jeremy and my brilliant daughter-in-law Marie, Kristen and Chelsea and her soon to be husband Sam are here in photographs and gifts they've left over the years. The back yard is now a wonderful work of art. Then it makes me remember ... Dad was just hitting his stride when he was 56. It was a life that no longer revolved around work but family and friends. He really enjoyed the next chapter, more than I think he enjoyed any other part of his life. He mellowed a little at the end but not really all that much. I find myself in curiously similiar circumstances. Life is no longer defined by work but by family and friends. It's as fun as it's ever been, as promising as I've ever experienced and hopefull as hell. There is an excitment because I no longer know what's going to happen next but ... I know with everything in me that it's going to be fun. So to quote the major prophet Bruce Cockburn ... "Sun's up, uh-huh, it's OK, the world survives into another day and I'm thinking about eternity ... some kind of ectasy got a hold on me" Uh-huh! Thanks Dad for going first and showing me the way.