Friday, December 8, 2017

The Dreams of Christmas

They've gotten so bad he dreads sleep.

Laying exhausted beside his purring wife, he fights it long into the night.

He welcomes sleep, lusts for it really ... desperately needs it but ... he can no longer bear what slumber brings.

Each dream he vividly remembers though he tries with everything inside to forget.

That damn Angel.

Not a white, round face, handsome cherub with white wings coming out of starched flowing robes, this Angel clings to the shadows, red eyes menacingly staring as he barks orders with a gravel, dark and sinister voice.

The first time the Angel hisses, "The baby's not yours ... He belongs to God ... Yes, it's a boy ... You are to name him 'Jesus' because ... like his namesake ... he's going to save the people."

"Jesus" is the Greek translation of the Hebrew word "Joshua" and Joshua was the one who helped Moses lead the people to the Promised Land overseeing the first military victory when walls of Jericho came tumbling down.

"And don't say a word of this to anyone," the Angel hisses in conclusion.

Joseph hasn't.

He goes through with the wedding to Mary after planing to put an end to it when she told him she was pregnant.

He loves her with everything inside of him.

It's got to be his baby ... she would never have cheated on him ... but ... even if it's not ... well ... it's God's ... we were giving it to God anyway ... He didn't have to take it!"

So that's what happens ... as natural as can be ... in the most unlikely of places.

Mary's all morning sickness, back aches and "Rub my feet" a pregnant woman has while Joseph is all ... "Can we get this over with?"

The politicians make it worse by raising taxes and calling for a national registry to ensure illegal immigrants pay their fair share so, Joe hauls his pregnant achy wife to his birthplace Bethlehem where the good sense to leave as soon as he came of age ... but now has to return because the Government is making him.

Mary talks a lot.

Unceasingly.

He nods while hardly saying a  word.

The baby comes and no one questions whether it's his and Joseph cries when the boy is born.

Unexpected people ... strangers ... bring expensive gifts and it's as Holy ... as surreal a thing as he's ever seen.

Almost immediately the damn Angel returns in another dream.

The Government's issued a dictate for ethnic cleansing and all children under two are being euthanized for public safety.

"Go to another country," the Angel hisses.

Joseph knows nothing about other countries, is flat broke and, having fulfilled his obligation by registering to pay his taxes, really wants to simply go home and show the baby off to the family.

He hocks the expensive baby presents for cold, hard cash.

For whatever reason, he never explains it to Mary nursing the baby as they leave, he doesn't go home but takes them to another country where ... they settle.

No one knows them.

Nobodies heard about a possible scandal of the baby not being his.

Life is good.

Until ... the damn Angel keeps him up at night.

"Leave here and return to where you left."

Joseph doesn't want to go.

They're safe and happy in Egypt, ironically the same place his son's namesake, Joshua led the chosen people out of, but the dream comes night after night after night ... so to stop them Joseph hauls the family back to where they'd started.

It's all the exact opposite of the Scriptural stories.

But the dream doesn't stop with the damn Angel hissing God's commands, so without saying a word, Joseph packs up the family to leave.

Mary questions it this time.

"What do you mean we're going home?" she yells. "This is home! Our son likes it here! We like it here."

And Joseph can't explain to his wife that he's having nightmares every night so he keeps his mouth shut as she screams and the baby boy cries, leaving everything they've known to go ... where the Angel told him to go.

It isn't a happy trip.

The wife complains and the baby cries.

When they arrive, the Angel bitches too, "You haven't gone far enough" so, because he'd listen to every dream so far, Joseph takes the family to Nazareth.

And that's the last he ever hears from the Angel.

The dreams stop.

Joseph makes a last Biblical appearance, when Jesus runs away from home to stay in Church, and with Mary and all the other kids screaming, he finally notices the oldest boy isn't with them, and turns around.

Twelve year old Jesus is lecturing the leaders and either they can't get a word in edgewise or are hanging on his every word.

Joseph grabs the boy and makes him go home.

And that's the last we ever hear of Joseph.

If we take an honest look, Christmas was one big bad dream for Jesus' earthly Dad.

The Heavenly Father gets all the credit but it was Joseph who endured restless nights, terrible dreams full of crazy instructions, leaving his carpentry business, questions about the boy being his and that damn Angel.

They'd be no Christmas though without Joseph and his bad dreams.

Jesus wouldn't have turned out the way he did without the quiet carpenter who was afraid to go to sleep listening to Angels in his dreams and never talked about it.

It makes me wonder if there would be more Christmas in the world if we listened to our dreams, even the nasty ones, as much as he did.