I’ve always been blessed with a lot of friends. My morning starts surrounded by them at the Breakfast Club where we all somehow take care of one another while having coffee. Most are working, others of us are watching but all of us are engaged with each other. There are hugs, lays, pats on the shoulder and quiet contemplative moments where we all stare into the vastness of the universe.
It progresses to the Bored Meeting in front of Fannies-On-the-Beach and we toast the ocean, life on the island, Roma’s increasing age, and how funny tourists can be. At the same time when one of us is having a difficult time the rest are there supporting, listening, encouraging or saying “You really are full of it” when we really are and don’t realize it.
Then there is Goddess. Forever exited when I walk through the door, constantly pushing her butt in my face so that I can let love out, doing funny things to make me laugh when laughing is the last thing that I want to do and sleeping in the doorway to my bedroom protecting me from whatever she thinks is going to come after me in the middle of the night. On walks I talk to her as much as I talk to anybody else and she cocks her head to the side to listen and agrees with most everything that I have to say. Not always! Sometimes she makes me take her out when it’s the last thing that I want to do but she knows I need the exercise.
Then there is the “moving parts” community … this collection of changing friends who congregate at various times for no apparent reason. Last night at Bernie’s there were friends from the Breakfast Club, from the Bored meeting, from my college days, neighbors and this strange couple from Savannah who kept us all entertained.
I am one of the fortunate parents who have children who grew up to be friends with me and one another. Individually and collectively we do all of the things that good friends do and I’ve learned how incredibly fortunate I am in this area.
Sometimes I get messages from people who are going through really difficult times, blaming themselves for things going wrong in the relationships that they are in. Hurting and grieving they remain because they fear what will happen if they leave or they leave because it’s easier for them. Leaving comes natural. Friends come and go in their lives. I don’t understand these people so I mostly listen and wonder how they do it.
There is this wider collection who maintains communication through technology and phone calls. They are from everywhere …literally around the world. I’ve been with them for long periods or short periods but we remain persistent in being part of one another’s lives.
Yesterday my friend Dedra showed up. We were friends in college then we took a thirty year vacation from one another. The miracle of Face Book got us back in touch (along with Mark and Mitch) and we realized that the friendship is as good as it ever was. I loved her then but I love her more now.
We just finished a morning start at the Breakfast Club, a walk with the Goddess and had a long talk in doing so … meaning that I did most of the talking. Dee is a really good listener. She soaks in the words and takes a long time pondering them before speaking. She walks away in the middle of a conversation and writes down all of her points on posted notes, spreading them all over the table so that she can make her points when the discussion resumes.
Then there is this one friend. She’s out there somewhere. “One day,” I tell myself, “we’ll be together and the friendships that I have will be blessed with a best friend.” I don’t know.
I just believe.
But I know that she’s there … painting her kitchen or cleaning up a mess or sleeping late or … whatever.
And one day … the circle of friends will be complete.
