Thursday, May 1, 2014

My Calling

I had vivid dreams about the Jefferson Street Baptist Chapel last night.

It was 30 years ago when I was the 20 something year old Pastor/Director of the inner city Baptist mission post primarily because no one else felt God calling them there.

The whole thing was an accident.

I'd done the "special music" one Sunday morning ... a rousing version of "I Saw the Light" by Hank Williams.

When I finished, a woman with a butcher knife stuck in her apron stood up, spit tobacco juice in a Maxwell House coffee can and yelled, "DO IT AGAIN!"

I suppose the Spirit of God moved her.

When a tobacco spitting woman with a butcher knife asks you to do something it's hard to say, "No."

So I did it again.

Later, in the same service, the minister resigned.

After Church, suddenly surrounded by little old ladies, she spit into her can and said, "You go to Seminary! You be our preacher."

"I don't want to be your preacher," I said shutting my guitar case.

"Tough," she spits. "We want you to be."

Hmmm. This is a tough woman. "I'm not called to be your preacher," I answer.

"We calling you," she spits.

"Shit," I think to myself.

She stares at me with venomous eyes.

"I've never preached a sermon in my life," I confess.

"Can't be any worse than a lot of the crap we've already had to listen to," she replies.

There is no arguing with this woman and I can't think of any other way to decline the calling.

Continuing to stare at me I notice her mouth is furiously working the tobacco plug which bothers me immensely.

I think to myself, "She's going to spit on me if I say "No" and a fear of downing in the Baptismal Pool in tobacco juice overwhelms me.

"Okay," I finally say.

Spitting a giant wad in the Maxwell House coffee can, she grins and says, "Good. Let's go eat."

That's how my calling happened.

I'm sure I've told this story before and my critics will say so but ... good stories merit retelling and it's damn good story.

I would never be where I am now had Buna Wynn not "threatened" me into the ministry.

She's long dead though I suppose there was a "Homecoming Service" somewhere last night and Buna ... being Buna ... was determined I attend.

So that's what happened all freaking night long!

Till I woke up and it's Sarah lying next to me.

Thank God!

Amen and Amen.