Hania ... not Tonya

So after everyone wishes Conner a happy birthday …

Yeah, I know his Dad shot off some rockets and Conner got conceived …

And I’ve already had to endure him waking me up this morning after keeping me out last night, watch Karima sing him “Happy Birthday” then kiss him multiple times, then Verna did the same, then he makes me change towels which is something he does every day, then Patti puts up a “Happy Birthday” thing above his door and he decides that he can do it better because it’s his birthday and Karima told him that he can do anything he wants on his birthday while I groaned listening to this …

But this isn’t about Conner. It is about his wife … Hania.

I am close to both but Hania takes care of me. Over the past year I’ve had a tendency to not eat and skip meals. This offends Hania so she reacts by stuffing whatever she has cooked into my mouth. This of course offends me but she doesn’t care and reacts by stuffing more stuff in my face. This makes Conner laugh which encourages her so my face gets stuffed with things that I do not want.

They are an uncaring couple.

And I love them with everything in me.

I tell them everything. We have no secrets. They SEE everything about me.

A couple of years ago when I found myself suddenly single Hania was the first person
I told. She happened to call for something and I burst into tears and blurted it out.

“You come here now,” she commanded. “You need to be taken care for once.”

I will never forget that.

I didn’t make plans to go to south Florida where they live so they planned it for me. Would I do a wedding for friends of theirs? Could I talk to a friend of theirs?
When I was there for work we met or I stayed at their house … and Hania stuffed food in my mouth.

Last night was a laid back Caribbean affair. My friend Hugh grilled tenderloin. Conner was off talking on the phone to a special person. Hania was watching me and at one point I watched her watch me.

And I immediately knew how blessed I am. In spite of all of the bad times, there are these wonderful people who love me. They go out of their way to prove again and again and again ... sitting on beloved back decks, sad little holy docks, at Bored meetings, in beach swings, on drunken bicycles and in orange bathrooms.

After dinner she, Conner and I walked to Papagayos for a night cap. There was hardly anyone in the restaurant but this guy from the “70’s show” … at least that’s what he looked like … disco 70’s hair … Tom Selleck mustache … wife beater black tee shirt …started hitting on Hania.

Her name is Polish which is where her family came from. It translates as “Ann Marie” in English.

Conner and I were cracking up when he said “Hania? Not Tonya? …well that is so much more beautiful.”

Hania looked at us for help.

He had a Pittsburgh Steelers tattoo on his arm.

“Are you from Pittsburgh?” I cleverly inquired.

“How did you know?” he slurred.

“Hines Ward,” I said high fiving him.

He missed.

And we laughed.

Then Hania assumed her role as designated walker …

And I woke up in my tiny little studio …

alone …

But knowing how loved I am …

And knowing how much I love …